how do we inherit characteristics from our parents

How do we inherit characteristics from our parents?
In my article do we inherit personality i said that we don't inherit characteristics from our parents but instead we develop them as a result the life experiences we pass through.

But if that's the case then why do so many children carry the same personality characteristics of their parents as if they inherited them?

In fact parents teach their children how to behave like them without noticing and as a result the children acquire the same characteristics of their parents as if they inherited them.

The truth about inheriting characteristics from our parents

Few weeks ago i was watching an anxious parent who was carrying his child while shouting at a security guard because he was locked inside a room by mistake. Without noticing that man was teaching his child how to become anxious when such a situation happens to him.

When that child grows up and becomes anxious when facing uncertainty people will think that he inherited this characteristic from his parent while in fact he just learned it.

people who Feel insecure transfer the feelings of insecurity to their children. For example parents who always worry about bad things become overly protective and as a result the child learns that the world is an unsafe place.

There are also some personality traits that the child develops that the parent never had. For example in my article The psychology of showing off i explained how only children can be indirectly taught to become showy adults as a result of the excessive attention they get.

so we don't inherit characteristics from our parents but we do learn how to behave like them as a result of watching them.

The good news is that if we do not inherit characteristics from our parents then its completely possible to unlearn the bad characteristics that we have learned. In the Solid Self confidence program i tell people that self confidence can be learned and that they reason most people lack self confidence is that they were taught how not to feel confident.

If we inherit characteristics from our parents twins would have been identical

If it was true that we inherit characteristics from our parents then twins would have been identical and would have had the same personality but that's also not the case.

Another thing that proves that theory wrong is that the birth order strongly affects the personality of a child. For example its not unusual for the oldest child to develop leadership skills as a result of the responsibilities that are always assigned to him.

So in short, its the life experiences that the child passes through that determines his personality characteristics and not inheritance.

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