Confidence building mantras have helped people achieve goals throughout the ages - even people whom others thought would never amount to anything. Steve Jobs was an unwanted child who was adopted as an infant. This did not stop him from thinking big. Albert Einstein had fine motor difficulties and couldn’t tie his shoe laces until he was about 8 years old. Your mind is conditioned to believe what you tell it to. Throw off the shackles you’ve built up and start looking at confidence building with fresh eyes.
Look at the pictures of these hellebores.
I took them from the same plant in my back garden. The first flower is beautiful, but in its state of underdevelopment, its full potential is not evident. The second picture shows more detail, more complexity. The same flower, in a few days, has matured to show and achieve its full capacity for development. This could very well be you, because building confidence is a process which is matured over time - with practice. Like everything in nature, you can regulate your advancement to happen in exactly the way you want it to. You can plan your maturity and influence your future positively. But first, you have to be aware of what you’re truly capable of.
The first hellebore is programmed by nature to ‘know’ what it needs to do to come to full fruition. The only way you’ll have enough confidence to plan out a direction in your life is to know where you want to go – what you want to become, and what you can become. You need to map out the direction, plan your journey to confidence building and travel at your own pace. In order to do this you must:
Write down your strengths
Write down where you want to be in 1 year, 2 years, 3 years.
Plan the best way to get there.
Most importantly, write down the first step you have to take in order to get there.
It’s one thing to imagine or picture your destination. It’s another thing altogether to try to achieve it all in one go. Looking at the big picture in life is never a good idea when building confidence. Sure, there are activities you can do to hold your goal in your mind in order to make it more real and accessible to you. Let me know if you need help with this.
However, the actual confidence-building work is a journey, not a destination. You can imagine yourself at the end of the road, but your actual walk should be taken in small chunks, because these are more manageable. In nature, in order for the hellebore flower to become so beautiful, it has to start life as a lowly, plain green bud. It builds up to gloriousness while its energies are saved and processed gradually. Divide and conquer to build confidence. Whatever your planned journey is, break it up in 4 parts and tackle a quarter at a time. I can assist you with this if you need help.
Build confidence by surrounding yourself with people who build you up
Your friends and other people you surround yourself with can really influence the way you feel about yourself. Many people have such low self-esteem they feel they have to tear other people down in order to feel good about themselves.
Do you live your life in the shadow of people like these? Are you scared of going to work because your colleagues there make you feel bad about yourself? Do you have friends who think the only way to have a good time is to make fun of you? Take off this baggage and free yourself. The only way you can even make a start on the road to building yourself up is by avoiding these people who’re clogging up your positive world. Drop them and start forging ahead, surrounding yourself with people who make everything look and feel possible. Support them on their journeys and they’ll support you on yours.
Do you have confidence-building mantras to help you advance in life? What are these and how have they helped you achieve your goals? These above mantras are the first, very basic ideals in order to start that journey to positive self assurance. They’ve been tried and tested, and although different elements of confidence-building work for different people, these aforementioned ones should work across the board. Here’s to you and your journey to building your confidence!
Anne Lyken-Garner is the founder of How To Build Confidence and the Relationship Blog. She’s an author and freelance writer whose specialities include confidence-building and relationship help. Anne’s inspirational memoir, ‘Sunday’s Child’ is to be published later this Spring.
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